Christina Aguilera ‘Wasn’t Comfortable’ With ‘Inauthentic’ Hypersexualization of Her Debut Era at 18

Christina Aguilera’s self-titled debut album just celebrated its 25th anniversary — and she’s looking back on some of the things she didn’t love about that era.

“It definitely was a time to hypersexualize the little girl playing innocent thing,” Aguilera, 43, recalled in a cover interview with Paper magazine published Wednesday, August 28. “I hated feeling like I had to play both sides of the coin in a way that I wasn't comfortable with and in a way that I felt was inauthentic.”

The pop star explained that her discomfort was one reason she did such a 180 on the famously raunchy single “Dirrty” from her 2002 album, Stripped.

“I'm not trying to be cutesy for nobody, I need to rough this up, whether you like it or not,” she recalled. “As I said, I was surrounded by a lot of older males, it was a different time. But it's definitely an environment to this day I don't like being around: the macho male gaze. I just can't do it, it's a really uncomfortable place for me to be. A lot of people can stomach that, but I'm just not that girl.”

Aguilera’s first album dropped in August 1999, just seven months after Britney Spears’ debut album, … Baby One More Time. Jessica Simpson’s Sweet Kisses followed in November of that same year, while Mandy Moore’s So Real appeared in December. All four women — just teens when they debuted on the scene — were frequently pitted against each other, and they were all subject to ever-changing commentary about their bodies and sexuality.

For Aguilera, the era was life-changing, but it didn’t come without downsides.

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“I was taught many lessons with [my first album], not only about myself and where I wanted to find joy in music, but when you have that level of success so early on there's so much disappointment that comes because people change around you,” she told Paper. “I was surrounded by a lot of male figures, where I constantly heard things you don't need to hear. I was caught in all of that and learned a lot early on to create ‘Fighter.’ Even ‘Dirrty,’ like stop with your ideals of me being in this little bubble of being sexy, but not too sexy. Be sweet, but not too sweet. Get all these ideals off me. I'm 21, I’m going out to clubs and having fun with my dancers.”

When Aguilera debuted a racier look in the “Dirrty” era — a year after Spears did the same with "I’m a Slave 4 U" —some commentators were scandalized, but she felt that she was being true to herself, agreeing with Paper’s assessment that the song was her “taking full ownership” of her sexuality.

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“For me, it's about the truth. I have to feel strong in my message and my core and what I'm doing out there,” she explained. “I didn't want to be a one-dimensional ballad singer, I didn't want to be known for one specific thing. That's where I started with Stripped, showcasing every side of myself unapologetically: from ‘Dirrty’ to the vulnerability of ‘Beautiful’ to the strength of ‘Fighter.’”

She added: “It caused a lot of commotion and conversation, but I welcomed it. I was like, ‘Why does this not sit well? Why does this bother you so much?’ It opened up a lot of conversations about politics and sexuality and double standards. I'm really proud, looking back, that I was that young and able to express that and do it passionately.”