My Day as a Semi-Special Agent in a Very Special NCIS Episode

All I ever wanted was cake.

Over the past 20-plus years, CBS’ NCIS has blown through many a milestone — 100 episodes! 200 episodes! 300! 400! — and usually with a party that served a Cake Shaped Like a Number.

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Each and every time, the running joke went, I would nag the show’s publicity team about how I never got a slice, despite my ongoing coverage of TV’s most-watched franchise — all while of course knowing that my being based out of the East Coast, 3,000 miles away from NCIS’ Santa Clarita nerve center, was a stumbling block.

But when CBS and CBS Studios officially celebrated the start of filming of the franchise’s 1,000th episode, which airs this Monday at 9/8c, I am happy to report that I finally got my piece of a Cake Shaped Like a Number.

Plus a walk-on role, as icing on said cake….

I have no lines in the episode “A Thousand Yards.” And if you blink when Gary Cole and Spencer Moore II step off the elevator into the squad room, midway through the episode, you will miss me. But it is me, Mom, playing Federal Agent Intently Walking a Very Important Folder Across the Room.

While not as splashy a role as, say, Body of Proof gravedigger, playing Special Agent Key — the name that I and only I gave him (as in kilo/1,000) — required some prep and grooming. Shortly after arriving at set, I was whisked away to Vicky Stevens in wardrobe, who handed me a very federal agent-y grey suit, complete with well-worn wingtips that I can most charitably describe as “government-issue.” (I guess Uncle Sam frowns on Bruno Magli.)

As my pants got hemmed, I was escorted to hair and makeup, where, as I expected, my ‘do was tamed a bit. (When not playing Agent Key, I tend to style it on the “high” side, to claim that extra half-inch on Bumble.) It was upon leaving H/MU that I spotted a full-size E.T. being dollied somewhere, after it’d been used for the preceding episode, and quickly snapped a pic. (Scoop!)

As seen in the episode ‘Strange Invaders’
As seen in the episode ‘Strange Invaders’

Upon fully “suiting up” back at wardrobe, I bumped into and chatted up Bones vet T.J. Thyne, who was guest-starring in the episode as a tech titan. (Scoop!) By keeping my eyes and ears open, I would also glean that Daniela Ruah and Vanessa Lachey would appear in this milestone episode, as NCIS: LA’s Kensi and NCIS: Hawai’i’s Jane. (More scoop!) I also spent a minute hanging out with Christopher Waild, who wrote the episode and teased some of the Easter eggs he’d scattered throughout. (More scoop!)

By now, my scene was “up,” and 2nd assistant director Jeb Barrows gave me my literal marching orders: I was to stand just off-camera in the hall by the squad room’s digital ticker, and as soon as my “cue” light flashed, walk my Very Important Folder over to the female agent sitting at the desk that shares a wall with Agent Knight’s. I’d be crossing directly in front of Agent Parker as I did so, just as he and Vance’s son, Jared, emerge from the elevator to survey the bustling, late-night squad room.

The Very Important Folder
The Very Important Folder

Easy enough, yes. But I assure you that the first thought that enters your head — especially if you learned anything from Smash‘s Karen — is: Gosh, I hope I don’t pull focus from Gary Cole! So at first I went with a thousand-yard stare, which given the episode’s title seemed fitting. But after the first take, I started doing some “character work” and asked myself: Why is Agent Key approaching this female agent as a stranger, when they’ve quite possibly been working together for years? So for the next couple of takes, I adjusted my gaze from being “detached” to one of familiarity. (I shared my “process” with Patricia Flores, the background actor who played the recipient of my folder, and she was, I want to say, amused.)

Plot twist! Just when I thought I had my performance locked down, Jeb came up to me with new direction from the milestone episode’s director, Diana Valentine: “Can you walk faster? Double-time it?”

I gotta say, this threw me a bit, especially since I hadn’t done any stretching — plus my government shoes were a bit slippery — but I channeled everything that Strasberg, Hagen, Meisner et al had taught me and amazingly didn’t end up accidentally shoulder-checking Gary Cole a single time.

Once the scene was filmed to Diana Valentine’s satisfaction, I changed back into my Matt Mitovich wardrobe while the squad room set was modified into serving as an event space, where dozens upon dozens would soon assemble for the official “1,000th episode” ceremony.

NCIS co-showrunners Steven D. Binder and David North were joined by their entire cast as well as visiting NCIS: LA alum Chris O’Donnell and — appearing via Zoom — onetime NCIS: New Orleans front man Scott Bakula (in New York for the Broadway musical The Connector), the NCIS: Hawai’i cast (congregated in their own HQ) and co-showrunner Jan Nash, and NCIS: Sydney leads Olivia Swann and Todd Lasance.

Network and studio brass on hand for the four-digit milestone included NCIS EP Charles Johnson, CBS Entertainment president Amy Reisenbach, CBS Studios president David Stapf and NCIS: Hawai’i co-showrunner Christopher Silber.

The 1,000 party Zoom room
The 1,000 party Zoom room

Following several laudatory speeches and (many) permutations of group photos taken with The Cake Shaped Like a Number, the actors and NCIS showrunners chatted with me and a select few peers on a short press line.

Cole’s first words to me were kudos for my performance (ha!), after which I asked/begged the showrunners not to cut me from the episode. Brian Dietzen and I had a nice moment, having Zoomed/both gotten emotional just days earlier about the David McCallum tribute episode he’d penned; Diana Reasonover absolutely crushed the NCIS trivia quiz I was running by everyone (alas, that video ran into a snafu), whereas Wilmer Valderrama… didn’t; Sean Murray (now the longest-running cast member) gave some great teases; and you don’t need me to tell you it’s always great to see the effervescent Katrina Law in person.

All the while, CBS photographer Robert Voets — whose name I very much recognized from pulling many a photo from the press site over the years — generously offered to chronicle any moment from my memorable day.

This is me not pressing the record button correctly (Robert Voets/CBS)
This is me not pressing the record button correctly (Robert Voets/CBS)

Once the press line wrapped, I sat with Rocky Carroll at lunch, then dove into my slice of NCIS cake that had been 1.5 decades in the making.

SPOILER ALERT! The Cake Shaped Like a Number? Turns out it is usually just a frosted foam prop used for the photo op, while the actual slices served to everyone come from a regular ol’ cake.

Even so, my experience as Agent Key was a sweet one, indeed.

Want scoop on NCIS or maybe a possible Agent Key spinoff ? Email [email protected], and your question may be answered via Matt’s Inside Line!

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