Internet pits Pooh against Paddington, and the results are unbearably adorable
Paddington 2 may have earned only $40 million at the domestic box office, but with a $218 million global haul — as well as a 100% rating (after 191 reviews) on Rotten Tomatoes — it’s clearly one of 2018’s best-received releases. Those who fell in love with the cinematic version of Michael Bond’s iconic bear, however, will soon have their hearts seduced by another furry, pantless CGI creature when Disney’s Christopher Robin debuts in theaters in August. And the internet is already taking sides in this cinematic battle, resulting in some adorable ridiculousness.
Two days ago, Twitter user @Bosslogic posted the match-up below, summing up the forthcoming fight for the affections of bear-loving American moviegoers.
They will put it all on the line and fight with their Bear hands#UFC230 #Paddington Vs #Pooh
Who you got ? @ufc pic.twitter.com/HZUHxVxtWp
— BossLogic (@Bosslogic) March 7, 2018
Immediately afterward, the internet began staking out suitably absurd positions:
controversial opinion but Paddington Bear would absolutely destroy Winnie the Pooh in a fight and he would barely break a sweat in the process
— Elliot (@ElliotHetherton) March 6, 2018
winnie the pooh > paddington bear, let's get into it
— Katy Stoll (@katystoll) March 6, 2018
Pooh is washing Paddington in a fight fwiw cause the Hundred Acre Wood is too mixxie but if the battlefield is puzzles and brain power, Pad wins.
— Craig Bro Dude (@CraigSJ) March 6, 2018
Paddington v Pooh: Dawn of Justice
— Ethan Dunlap (@thisissolemons) March 6, 2018
paddington (who represents the freudian concept of the super-ego) loves marmalade, which contains all the vitamins and minerals a bear needs for a whole day. winnie the pooh (a symbol of man's id) covets honey, which is gluttonous bee excrement that has no nutritional value.
— literally satan (@kiefdemons) March 6, 2018
Still, some — like Entertainment Weekly — preached peace, not war:
please stop trying to make pooh and paddington fight
we have like eleven pure things left— Brock Wilbur (@brockwilbur) March 7, 2018
I am still reeling from Janney v. Metcalf and I frankly just do not have the energy for Pooh v. Paddington pic.twitter.com/oS9UUwQ69X
— Marc (@MarcSnetiker) March 6, 2018
Friends, Paddington wouldn’t participate in this conflict-oriented narrative. He’d say there’s plenty of room for two kind little bears and make a marmalade-honey sandwich for Pooh. https://t.co/k67RO9XvVv
— Kevin T. Paddington (@KevinTPorter) March 7, 2018
paddington vs pooh is terrible. they would be friends
— antonio (@guapitx) March 7, 2018
So who you got in the forthcoming Bear Battle Royale? Let us know in the comments below.
Christopher Robin hits theaters Aug. 3.
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