Jennifer Lopez’s first husband recalls her ‘anxieties and insecurities,’ says he relates to ‘amazing’ Ben Affleck

The first man to ever marry Jennifer Lopez is weighing in on her fourth divorce.

Ojani Noa, who was married to the singer for less than a year in the ’90s, gave her some relationship advice following her split from Ben Affleck.

“Stay single for a while, take 12 months off,” Noa, 50, said in an interview with the Daily Mail published over the weekend.

Ojani Noa, Jennifer Lopez in 1998. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Ojani Noa, Jennifer Lopez in 1998. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images

“If she meets someone new, maybe keep it private and not get -married again,” he added.

Lopez met the former waiter in 1996 at Gloria Estefan’s restaurant in Miami. They married in February 1997, only to get divorced 11 months later.

Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa at the “U Turn” premiere in 1997. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa at the “U Turn” premiere in 1997. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Ojani Noa at the “Hoy Dia Bailamos” premiere in Florida on Jan. 26, 2024. Getty Images
Ojani Noa at the “Hoy Dia Bailamos” premiere in Florida on Jan. 26, 2024. Getty Images

Noa said that based on his history with Lopez and watching her documentary “The Greatest Love Story Never Told,” he can relate to Affleck, 52, who is getting divorced from the “Hustlers” star after two years of marriage.

“I can tell you in my own -experience, we would have -disagreements in the car and then 20 minutes later, we’d have to sit and pretend everything was fine,” he said, in relation to the many photos of Affleck looking miserable when he was out with Lopez.

Ben Affleck and J.Lo at “The Mother” premiere in May 2023. Getty Images for Netflix
Ben Affleck and J.Lo at “The Mother” premiere in May 2023. Getty Images for Netflix

“But you can only pretend so much,” Noa added. “When we were going through hell and going out as a couple, I was in a bad mood too. Because I knew inside we were not good.”

“I hated going on the red -carpet,” he also said. “She would try and get me to come and I’d say: ‘No way. I’m not going to pretend.'”

Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa at the “Selena” premiere in 1997. WireImage
Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa at the “Selena” premiere in 1997. WireImage

Noa said he’s met Affleck before and called the “Argo” actor an “amazing guy.”

“Even though they’re both in the spotlight, you can tell that he’s a really private man,” Noa added about Affleck.

He said that Lopez “has to like the spotlight for her to stay in it.”

Ojani Noa and J.Lo at the 1998 Golden Globes. Getty Images
Ojani Noa and J.Lo at the 1998 Golden Globes. Getty Images
Ojani Noa and Jennifer Lopez at “That Old Feeling” premiere in 1997. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Ojani Noa and Jennifer Lopez at “That Old Feeling” premiere in 1997. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images

Despite their divorce, Noa clarified that he has “no bad feelings” toward the “Let’s Get Loud” singer.

“I would always be her friend. I sympathize with both of them because divorce is hard,” he said.

Looking back on their marriage, Noa said of Lopez, “I was the first, the pioneer. I was there at the beginning of her career supporting her, -dealing with her anxieties and insecurities. I was a really good husband because I believe in marriage. When we divorced, I was heartbroken. I feel when she got what she wanted, I was no longer needed.”

Ojani Noa at the 2023 Billboard Latin Music Awards. Getty Images
Ojani Noa at the 2023 Billboard Latin Music Awards. Getty Images

After Noa, Lopez was married to Cris Judd from 2001 to 2002 and Marc Anthony from 2004 to 2011. Anthony, 56, is the father of her 16-year-old twins Max and Emme.

She wed Affleck in Las Vegas in July 2022, two decades after they ended their first engagement in 2004. They held a second, more extravagant wedding at Affleck’s home in Riceboro, Georgia, on Aug. 20, 2022.

Exactly two years later, Lopez filed for divorce from Affleck.

Ben Affleck at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Sept. 14, 2024. LXXVI/Splash News / SplashNews.com
Ben Affleck at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Sept. 14, 2024. LXXVI/Splash News / SplashNews.com
Jennifer Lopez at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Sept. 14, 2024. Thecelebrityfinder/MEGA
Jennifer Lopez at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Sept. 14, 2024. Thecelebrityfinder/MEGA

This came after months of divorce rumors, during which the pair were apart for monumental events like Lopez’s 55th birthday and their second wedding anniversary. They also put their $68 million Beverly Hills marital home on the market as Affleck bought his own mansion for $20 million.

Lopez cited irreconcilable differences as the reason for her split from Affleck.

Ben Affleck and J.Lo with their kids in Beverly Hills. Thecelebrityfinder/MEGA
Ben Affleck and J.Lo with their kids in Beverly Hills. Thecelebrityfinder/MEGA

She reportedly filed on the two-year anniversary of their Georgia wedding “because she wanted it to sting.”

The estranged couple allegedly did not have a prenup.

Despite their split, “Bennifer” reunited with their children for lunch in Beverly Hills over the weekend. A source told People the stars are “still moving forward with the divorce” but came together so their kids could see each other.