Stephen Colbert Pans Donald Trump’s Historic Flag Dry-Hump Speech At CPAC
Returning to Late Night after a break, Stephen Colbert said his week had been “great because I’m not Donald Trump.”
“The news cycle rode him hard and put him away wet,” the CBS late-night host joked of the week that included Trump’s failed Hanoi summit with North Korean ruler Kim Jong Un and his former fixer’s televised testimony before the House Oversight Committee.
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Colbert admitted he had “unplugged” from the news cycle while on his break but, a couple days before returning, started taking “little sips of the poison so it does not kill you on Day 1 back.”
First indication that the Orange Man was feeling blue, Colbert recalled, was Saturday’s historically long and epically weird speech at the Conservative Political Action Conference – “or D-BAG” – after “dry humping Old Glory.” Historically, it marked the “first time a flag has ever volunteered to be burned,” Colbert explained.
The speech also marked the longest presidential oration in American history, he added, revealing Trump spoke off script for 2 hours and 2 minutes.
Among Trump’s comments, he told CPAC attendees and TV viewers that Democrats “try to take you out with bullsh*t, bullsh*t.”
“Very presidential” Colbert said. “I’m reminded of Abraham Lincoln’s famous declaration: ‘Hey Robert E Lee – f*ck you.”
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