16 Pumpkin Spice Items That Flew A Liiiiiittle Too Close To The Sun
1.Pumpkin Spice Spam
Listen, I like Spam. I can get behind flavored Spam. But pumpkin spice Spam?? That doesn't sit right with me.
2.Pumpkin Spice Cheese
Okay, I'm kinda open to this one. This could maybe be good. But it could also be too spice-heavy and incredibly awful and...I don't wanna think about it anymore.
3.Pumpkin Spice Dog Treats
Genuine question — do dogs even like pumpkin spice?
4.Bud Light Pumpkin Spice Seltzer
I'm like 50% intrigued and 50% mildly horrified by this. If you're also feeling curious (which, honestly, you should be), our very own Hannah Dobrogosz taste-tested this seltzer so you don't have to. Read all about it here.
5.Pumpkin Spice Cup Noodles
6.Pumpkin Spice Salsa
I'm not mad about the idea of pumpkin salsa. Spicy pumpkin salsa actually sounds really good. Pumpkin SPICE salsa? I'm gonna have to pass.
7.Pumpkin Spice Kale Chips
Sweet kale chips in general don't sound super appetizing to me. But pumpkin spice kale chips?? We truly have strayed too far from the light.
8.Pumpkin Spice Kombucha
We really don't have to pumpkin spice ~everything~, y'all.
9.Pumpkin Spice Scented Boxer Briefs
I have so many questions, and I'm really not sure I want any of the answers. These boxer briefs have a scratch-and-sniff jack-o'-lantern graphic on the bottom right corner that — you guessed it — smells like pumpkin spice.
10.Pumpkin Spice Hummus
I actually tried this hummus — and every other pumpkin spice item available at Trader Joe's — and thought it was alright. But does it need to exist? Is it better than regular hummus? Personally, I don't think so.
11.Pumpkin Spice Salad
This salad doesn't sound all bad, honestly. I can dig the toppings, but I'm not completely sold on the idea of a pumpkin spice vinaigrette when we could have...literally anything else.
12.Pumpkin Spice Pasta Sauce
13.Pumpkin Spice Candy Corn
Controversial opinion, but I think candy corn on its own is...not good. I'm not sure the fix here was to add pumpkin spice to it.
14.Pumpkin Spice Glazed Turkey Breast
Again, I think this could be kinda good. But I am also not entirely convinced that it should exist.
15.Pumpkin Spice Cough Drops
16.And finally, Pumpkin Spice Salmon
Alright, this is the one that broke me. I don't have words for this. Why???
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