So you’ve managed to score an invite to the social event of the year—congratulations, darling. Now to ensure that you have an absolutely smashing time (and don’t embarrass yourself or the nation), here are a few etiquette rules to keep in mind as you rub shoulders with the aristocracy. (And for the rest of us plebs, we’ll just have to use these guidelines to imagine all the fabulousness we’re missing out on.)

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Don’t: Show Up After the Queen

“The queen should be the very last person to arrive at the church before the bride and her attendants,” says wedding planner and etiquette adviser Sarah Hayward. And considering that this wedding will have significantly more VIPs than your standard nuptials (no offense, cousin Sheryl), you’re definitely going to want to add in some extra time to find your seat.

Do: Turn Off Your Phone

A good rule of thumb for all weddings—royal or not. And if Meghan and Harry follow the precedent of the 2011 royal wedding, then there will be no photography in Windsor Castle, meaning no #royalselfie for you.

Don’t: Hug the Queen

In fact, don’t touch or even speak to Her Majesty unless she does so first. (And do not, under any circumstances, pet the dorgis.)

Do: Wear a Hat

Time to don your Sunday best—that means headpieces for the ladies (even Kate Middleton has to follow this rule) and suits for the gents. We’re partial to a feathery fascinator, but a felt pillbox is also a chic choice. (Hey, when else will you get to wear one?)

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Don’t: Overdo the Curtsy

According to the Debrett's New Guide to Etiquette and Modern Manners, “low sweeping curtseys, although usually well meant, are best reserved for the amateur dramatic stage and can be the subject of some amusement within Royal circles.” Yikes. Instead, ladies should opt for a brief bob with the weight on the front foot and gentlemen should opt for a small nod, and look down briefly.

Do: Greet the Couple Quickly

There will most likely be a receiving line at the reception and experts have estimated that as many as 600 people will be invited. So yeah, you do the math. Simply say, “Thank you very much,” and then move along.

Don’t: Get Drunk

Unless you want to ensure that you never get invited to another royal wedding again, that is. (After all, Princess Eugenie’s is just around the corner.)

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