Feeling Stuck in Life? Career Coaches Swear by This One Simple, Unexpected Question To Find Your Passion
Can a simple question help you break out of an employment rut? One expert believes so, and TikTok, as well as career coaches, have thoughts.
Mimi Turner, the head of EMEA & Latin America at LinkedIn's The B2B Institute, was a recent guest on the How I Became podcast and shared the "tiny career tip" she feels is life-changing.
The genius hack? According to Turner, asking yourself to pinpoint the "things that you find easy."
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Turner swears this question is more effective than more common ones used to find a passion, such as "What do I like/What do I want to do/What do I care about?"
"These are interesting questions that, to some extent, are fabricated in the picture we paint of ourselves," Turner explained to hosts Ashley Samuels-McKenzie and Charles Parkinson on an episode that aired on May 11. "'What do you find easy?' is a question that’s open, and I think most people can find a way of answering that."
It almost sounds—dare we say it—too easy. We asked other career experts for their thoughts.
Related: The No. 1 Surprising Sign of Workplace Burnout
Can Asking "What Do You Find Easy?" Help Someone Get Unstuck?
A pair of career experts agree with Turner—it might.
"Asking yourself, 'What comes easy to me?' can be helpful when you’re feeling stuck because it taps into your intuition, plays to your strengths and allows you to leverage your talents," says Dr. Kyle Elliott, MPA, CHES, the founder and a career coach with CaffeinatedKyle.com. "Additionally, it removes much of the stress associated with work."
Another expert agrees that removing the stress factor makes this question good.
"If you work with talents that come easily to you, you should hopefully have less stress and be able to reach achievements in that career more easily too," says Mandy Steinhardt, a career and intuitive life coach.
But Steinhardt offered a caveat.
"I don’t think that ease should be the only or most important consideration," Steinhardt says. "If you choose something involving math because you are good at it, but you also don’t enjoy it, that will not make for a fulfilling career."
Related: 60 Diverse and Flexible Side Jobs for Teachers—Online, Remote, Creative Jobs and More!
How to Figure Out What Comes Easy to You
This one should be a cinch, right? Maybe not.
"Many of us were raised to believe that you must work hard and that rest is for the weak," says Dr. Elliott.
But think back on your upbringing before "hustle culture" got to you.
"One way to tap into what you find easy is to reflect on your childhood and revisit those activities that brought you joy before the pressures of society and making a living kicked in," Dr. Elliott explains.
Steinhardt says a few follow-up questions may help you find the answer, including:
What takes other people much longer to do or figure out than you?
What do you often volunteer for because you have a specific way of doing it and can complete the task faster than others?
What do your friends or colleagues compliment you for?
What are you naturally excited to learn more about?
You may wind up with a list of numerous things you find easy—which should you choose? Can you find something that incorporates all of your strengths for one gig you're super-passionate about for so many reasons? It's a good problem to have, but it can be stressful. Dr. Elliott suggests taking a beat.
"Keep in mind that you may not find a 'perfect' job that incorporates everything you find easy, and that’s OK," says Dr. Elliott.
Related: Combat High-Achiever Burnout With One Phrase
Commenters Offer Suggestions
TikTok followers shared their recommendations for other questions or prompts to use when attempting to get "unstuck" in the original video's comments. Parade asked Dr. Elliott and Steinhardt to give their opinions.
1. What do people ask you for help with?
Steinhardt loves it.
"Great question," she says. "[Others] often see some of the hidden talents that we are unaware of."
Dr. Elliott is also a fan.
"This can be helpful, especially if you struggle with self-reflection, as it gives you a sense of how other people, and particularly the job market, may perceive you," he says.
2. What can you tolerate, and where are the gaps in the job market? What is the easiest thing you can do for the most money?
The commenter said they tell their kids that. The advice is well-meaning, but Steinhardt and Dr. Elliott offer nuance—particularly for people trying to become "unstuck" and pursue a passion.
"'Tolerate' is not really a word I use with clients when career planning," Steinhardt explains. "I’d rather you find something that excites you than something you can tolerate."
Money can be exciting, but it's not everything.
"While it’s important to keep in mind the current market when looking for a job—we do live in a capitalist society after all—simply chasing money will not lead to happiness," Dr. Elliott says. "Consider using the job market as a factor when looking for your next job, but not the only one.
Ultimately, this one may be a case of different strokes for different folks.
"Some people are comfortable with a boring job and exciting hobbies, and others need more of a challenge and curiosity to bring to the day job," Steinhardt says.
3. Sounds like the question is [asking], "What comes naturally to you?"
Sort of, says Steinhardt.
"But if what comes naturally to you is to avoid risks and do what you have always done, that will not help you carve a new, satisfying career path," she says. "You have to push yourself to see the possibilities and believe that you can achieve it."
Related: The No. 1 Sign You're About to Have an Existential Crisis
3 More Tactics To Get Unstuck, According to a Career Expert
1. What do you enjoy, and why?
Turner may be iffy on this one, but Dr. Elliott likes it.
"Reflect on activities you enjoy and what they have in common," Dr. Elliott says. "If they all involve being around people or outdoors, consider how you can integrate elements of this into your work."
2. What makes you fabulous?
It's one of Dr. Elliott's favorite questions to have clients ask themselves.
"Then, noodle on what jobs you would excel in if you leveraged this fabulousness," he suggests.
3. Phone a friend.
Reflecting on what others ask you for help with can be useful. But Dr. Elliott notes that actually asking them what they see in you may also help.
"If you’re having a hard time figuring something out, turn to those you trust and ask for recommendations," Dr. Elliott says. "Ask them when they believe that you’ve been most in your element and less stressed, as it’s hard to read the label from inside the bottle."
Related: Yikes—This Is the #1 Biggest Red Flag in a Job Interview, According to Career Experts
Signs You're Stuck in Your Career
Unsure if you're in a rut? You may be if you're noticing energy shifts.
"One sign you may be stuck is if you’re feeling increasingly numb or exhausted since feeling stuck can drain your energy," Dr. Elliott says. "Because of the uncertainty often involved with feeling stuck, you might also feel anxious or scared."
Your angst levels may also be sky-high.
"You may be bitter about your tasks at work, even though they are a reasonable workload," Steinhardt says.
The good news? Once you break free from whatever is holding you back, there's hope and growth.
"Getting unstuck is good, in part, because you feel more at peace when you have confidence in where you are as well as a sense of clarity in where you’re headed," Dr. Elliott explains.