Parents Are Sharing Secret Things Their Teens Don't Know They Know And It's The Stuff Of Nightmares If You Are, In Fact, A Teen

So, there's a gem of a Reddit thread where user u/OpinionKid asked parents to share the secrets they know about their teens that their teens don't know they know.

FOX

And as you can imagine, there were secrets spilled. Here are some the most slightly embarrassing ones:

1."When my son started getting wet dreams, he made a loincloth out of toilet paper and duct tape to wear at night. It looked like a big silver diaper."

2."Found some VERY dirty stuff on my browser history after my daughter spent the night (she is 14) and also a Google search on how to delete history — she was unsuccessful. I was very disappointed about her lacking computer skills..."

ABC

—u/pasher71

3.This one's from a kid who found out later in life that her mom could understand her and her friends' ~secret~ conversations: "My school district taught students how to speak French starting in Kindergarten. In high school, my friends and I were pretty much fluent and would speak French over the phone to make secret plans to hang out after our parents went to sleep. I learned in college that my mother is fluent in French. I always wondered how she knew I was sneaking out."

20th Century Fox

–u/thewitch

4."One day my son came home very late from school. He had a shit-eating grin and avoided eye contact with me. He immediately took a shower, something he never did after school. I knew that was the day he lost his virginity. I checked the condoms I kept stored in a drawer in the living room — yep, some were missing."

CW

—u/Liar_tuck

5."When my kids were still too young to drive, I would drive them and their friends places. If I was quiet and just drove, they seemed to forget I was there and would discuss stuff. I learned a lot about what was going on during those drives..."

NBC

"My mom told me that when I was a teen and she was driving myself and friends around she would fade the music to the back, turn it up, and then listen to our conversation. The music was loud; we thought she couldn't hear so we would talk freely."

–u/galactica216

(Basically, if your mom or dad turns down the music and are being really quiet in the car, you can bet your bottom dollar they are eavesdropping!!!)

6."I know that my son is using his socks for masturbating. Seriously, I'm the one who fucking cleans them. STOP IT, DAMNIT!!!"

ABC

—Anonymous

7."Back when kids instant messaged on AOL, I let my kids do it all the time. They thought that was so cool and generous of me. What they didn't know was that I installed software that sent me a transcript of all their IMs."

Hulu

"I have no regrets about doing this, and the reason I did it was because they always lied and deceived us. Had I not done this, I wouldn't have known about my daughter sneaking boys into our house. As adults now, they admit now what shitheads they were and regret their behavior and the consequences of it."

–u/always-right

8."I know that my teenage son texts critiques to his girlfriend after sex. He is incredibly confident and a huge asshole..."

New Line Cinema

—Anonymous

And, finally, these parents who totally spoiled their teen son to the max, but had ulterior motives for doing so:

9."When we moved into our house, I redid an old workshop that was away from the house so my son and his mates could use it. It's carpeted and curtained for insulation/soundproofing, light/heat/fridge, and fully networked for internet/XBox. It also has its own entrance so people can come and go. When he was a teenager, it was packed with his friends every night, and on weekends they'd even sleep in there. But while he thought he was getting a great deal from us, we at least knew where he was every night and never had to worry about him hanging out on street corners or committing petty crimes because he had nothing else to do. Giving myself, and more importantly, my wife, that peace of mind was priceless."

NBC

–u/swinefever

So just accept the fact that your parents probably know more than you think, and understand that parenting is hard!!!

NBC