Riverdale Recap: Everyone's Lost Their Minds
Warning: Spoilers for Riverdale season two, episode four, "The Town That Dreaded Sundown," are ahead.
Let's just start by saying this episode was so crazy, it didn't need Cheryl Blossom. Good for you, Cheryl! You deserved a break from burning down houses, creeping around hospitals, and stalking Kevin Keller. Now sit back, relax, and watch as everyone else loses their goddamn minds - starting with our gun-toting, red-haired vigilante, Archie Andrews.
The town is unanimously affronted by Archie's "Unabomber-like manifesto," which strips away any semblance of his golden-boy status. He's been kicked off the football team, which is also disbanded until Andrews and the Red Circle (that should definitely be his band name when he returns to his music career) sign a letter of apology to the school. The mayor has called a town hall meeting, and it looks like his crew is disbanding already. See, Reggie and co. are pissed that there are actual consequences for their actions, and even more upset when Archie refuses to apologize. For now, they quit. But, as Dilton Doiley - slowly becoming my prime suspect as the mastermind behind the Black Hood - creepily points out, Archie always really wanted to take on his nemesis one-on-one "to the death." After supplying Archie with a gun two episodes ago, Doiley's more than happy to point him in the direction of more nefarious supplies. Now, Archie's planning to go into the Black Hood's "territory," which he's assuming is the south side, where he already has a target on his back.
Not even Veronica is on board...initially. But once Archie tells her it was her father who put the idea in his head (yes, the same guy who just told her to break up with Archie over the video from last episode), she's TRC (team Red Circle). With T-shirts! (I'd also like to congratulate Veronica on only saying "Daddy" four times this episode.)
Meanwhile, over on the wrong side of the tracks, baby Serpent Sweet Pea's got ahold of the video and decided the perfect initiation for a wannabe club member would be to attack our fearless leader. Side note: Why does Sweet Pea have so much power over the Serpents? Wouldn't initiation be handled by FP or literally any other adult in the gang? Anyway, Jughead attempts to goad them into taking on the Black Hood instead, but it turns out the southsiders consider the Black Hood a hero for taking out the hypocrites to the north.
Oh, and everyone on the north side is pretty much convinced the Black Hood is from the south side, even though that literally makes no sense. Especially if you consider his newest letter, addressed to Betty Cooper. See, it's not people close to Archie the Black Hood is targeting, but Betty herself. He was inspired by her speech at the last Town Hall meeting (looks like it's not Hiram, then?) and is basically doing all this in her name, according to this new letter, sent with a cypher for decoding his next target. She's rightfully freaked out, but takes the logical next step and brings the entire package directly to Sheriff Keller...JK, she decides to keep the letter to herself and hands off the cypher to her mother, who prints it in the paper for the whole town to take a stab at deciphering.
This is where Bughead diehards need to buckle their seatbelts, because things are about to get rocky. Jughead is ignoring Betty's calls and lightly flirting with Toni Topaz over their shared love of serial killers and true crime (Jughead's crack). Very romantic. They've agreed to work on the Black Hood's cypher together for the Red and Black. He later texts Betty, "Sorry for the phone tag - talk tomorrow" and I already hate this.
When Betty finally tracks him down before school the next day, she too thinks cracking serial killer codes sounds like a perfect date. When he tells her he's already promised to work on it with Toni, Betty is visibly disappointed, but suggests they all work on it together - plus Kevin!
It does not go well.
Basically, Toni has no interest in hiding her disdain for Betty Cooper. When Betty, who still hasn't shared the original letter with anyone other than Kevin, swears the answer to the code is at the top of her head, Toni replies, "Maybe if you loosened your ponytail..." Which just feels very aggressive, but leads to the best line of the week, from Kevin: "Betty's ponytail is iconic and beyond reproach."
Still, that doesn't exactly help. When Betty mentions that the attacks seem to be centered on the north side - which is exactly what Sweet Pea said just a couple of scenes ago - Toni goes off. Of course Betty thinks the Black Hood is from the south side, because she hates the south side...which she knows because Jughead has been lying to Betty about sitting with the Serpents at lunch. I don't actually think Toni's problem is with Betty or the "north side neo-nazis." This outburst feels more like a way to expand the wedge forming between our favorite ship. Is it inspired by romantic feelings for Jughead or simply part of a ploy with Sweet Pea to bring Jughead fully into the Serpent fold? I'm not sure yet.
Speaking of Sweet Pea, the baby-faced Serpent doesn't have to wait long for his confrontation with Archie Andrews. After buying ammo, a holster, and a kevlar vest, Archie takes to the south side to tag some shit with Veronica's signature target, which was just a horrible, reckless idea. He's caught by the Serpent, who threatens him with a knife, which is terrifying until Archie whips out his gun and shoves it in the teen's face. This is only the first time I yelled "WTF, ARCHIE?" at my screen tonight.
The next day Archie's suspended because the principal and Sheriff Keller found Reggie's black hood in his locker. They were actually looking for the gun, after a report came in about some red-haired kid waving one around over on the south side. Later, Archie has Veronica go back to retrieve the gun for him, and I'm furious. How dare you bring a gun into a school? And how dare you force Veronica to be a part of this? She's not happy either, and tells him she threw the gun in the river. Archie's obviously not in his right mind and admits, “I want him dead, Veronica. I want the Black Hood dead. And I want to be the one who does it. I want to be the last thing he sees.” Not a great week for our two main ships.
But the blowout will have to wait, because Reggie and co. arrive at Archie's, and the Red Circle is back on. Apparently, Archie is a "top-tier loyal badass" for not telling the principal that the hood in his locker was Reggie's. But before they can all hug it out, here comes trouble with a capital T: Sweet Pea. The Serpents show up to challenge Archie and his mates to some old-fashioned Saturday Night Fever rumble. The one rule: no weapons.
Back in the much less scary world of Bughead, Jug has found the letter Betty's been hiding. It turns out she's been terrified that Archie will blame her for the Black Hood's actions. Barchie or no Barchie, it's really nice to get a callback to their close friendship, considering they haven't interacted much yet this season. Jughead, of course, assures her that Archie knows who the bad guys are (does he?), and that Betty is not one of them. She's "Nancy Drew meets the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo." Instead of being an adorable moment, this actually triggers Betty's memory and helps her to crack the code.
Here's the deal: The Black Hood has to be someone who knows Betty well enough to know she obsessively checked out The Nancy Drew Secret Codes as a child. Another point for those who were thinking that Hal is our killer. Whatever's in that book leads Betty and Jughead to believe the next target is at the town hall meeting, where Alice Cooper is currently facing off agains Fred Andrews.
According to Alice, the root of all of Riverdale's trouble comes from the south side, while Fred blames her for dividing the community. Alice suggests closing South Side High and using the funding to bolster the police department, which, again, makes no sense. So she wants these kids she's so afraid of and the Jingle Jangle they're dealing in the same school as her kid? It would be great for plot reasons to bring Jughead back into the same building as the core group, but that doesn't seem like something Alice would want. Meanwhile, Hermione tells Hiram, "I told you Fred was gonna be a problem," but Hiram responds that since the town loves and respects him, he can be useful. I still have no idea what they're up to.
The argument is broken up when Betty and Jughead burst in to warn the adults that the Black Hood is coming, and immediately the power goes out. Betty pulls the fire alarm, and saves the day...
...Just like Veronica over at the rumble. As the parents are duking it out with words in the safety of the auditorium, the north vs. south side battle is being fought literally by our boys in the pouring rain. Obviously, Sweet Pea does not abide by the no-weapons rule and ends up stabbing Dilton Doiley in the leg. Luckily, Veronica pulls out the gun she did not actually throw into Sweetwater River and shoots it in the air, effectively ending the fight.
Only then does Archie finally seem to grasp the weight of his own actions. He's terrified of what would have happened if he had the gun with him (same), so he and Veronica finally go and throw it in the river together. But right before we can end this episode and spare me another heart attack, Betty, who finally gives the letter to the police, gets a call from the Black Hood. We'll have to wait to see what he says, but if I were him I'd call to remind everyone that Cheryl did not have one line this episode, which is fine just this once but better not happen ever again.
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