Two dads share their twins’ unique origin story in a book that resonates with families of all kinds

In those first few days after we found out that our surrogate was pregnant with our twins, I did a lot of daydreaming. I would sit for hours and imagine what life would be like after their arrival. The one scene that kept flashing in my mind had all of us in the car together and the twins asking hundreds of questions about everything, as kids love to do.

You Come from Love — children's book by Adam Motz

$15 at Amazon.com

I was really looking forward to answering all of their questions. Every detail about why the sky is blue or where rain comes from. But there was one line of questioning that I knew would come up eventually, and I wanted to be sure I was ready with the perfect answer.

I knew that someday the kids would ask where they come from. Why they have two dads. Why they don’t have a mom. Big questions that can be answered a lot of different ways.

We had already decided that we won't keep anything from the kids. If they have questions, we're going to give open and honest answers, in an age-appropriate way.

As I thought about how I would answer those big questions about their origin, I knew that I wanted them to understand, first and foremost, that they come from love. And I wanted them to know exactly what we mean when we say that.

When we say “you come from love,” we're talking about all the countless things that explain who we are and how we got here. It’s our family, it’s God, our ancestors, the universe. It’s our backgrounds, our homelands, our beliefs, our history. Everything we can explain and all the things we can’t.

Of course, they’ll eventually find out about the medical science involved in their physical creation. They will one day know that they were created through IVF. That we used eggs from my close friend to have embryos created using each of our sperm. That we transferred two embryos at the same time into our gestational surrogate, a close friend of Tee’s. That she carried them for about nine months. That they were born on the same day, in the same hospital, 7 hours apart. That they are related to each other and to us by blood and by love.

But we believe that it’s most important for them to understand that they are made from and surrounded by love.

As I sat there thinking about all the different things that love means to us, I started to write them all down. Love from the universe, the stars, the God that made you who you are. Love from your ancestors, your tribe, your family that brought you to life. As the list got longer, I organized it into a poem.

Reading that poem, I got the idea to make them their own little book. Each page could have a different section of the poem, with some sort of illustration to go with it. The illustrations would reflect all the unique qualities about them and our family. It would be a lasting gift for them to grow with and understand more deeply as they got older.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that their little book applied to just about every other family out there that is built on love. We all have ancestors. We all have a story. The values shared in the book are universal.

I talked to an artist friend about doing the illustrations. We met at a queer, storytelling, bar church where we celebrate diversity and love. I knew she would understand deeply the message behind the book. And she did. She created vibrant, beautiful paintings — illustrations that really brought the whole project together.

I worked on this book little by little for almost two years. It started while the girls were in the womb, but it wasn’t finally published until a few months after their first birthday. This was a gift to them straight from my heart.

And now, this book that started as the answer to a question in a daydream is a reality. I’ll never forget seeing their faces light up the first time I shared it with them. They saw elements of their family in the pages, and they were captivated by the colorful pictures.

In these few short years, the book has been an early way for us to share our story with the kids. They ask for the book by name. They have its contents memorized. They are learning more about our story and using the illustrations to ask even more questions. As they grow, we’ll use it to dive even deeper into their questions about who they are and how they got here.

We’ve heard from many families of all different backgrounds who are using the book for that same purpose. And we’ve heard from still more who are using the book as a jumping off point for discussions around diversity, different family makeups, and building a world of inclusion and love.

I wrote You Come from Love for my girls to know that they come from love and that love flows from them. What started as a gift for them has grown into something that has meaning for other families, too. Because it’s a truth meant for all of us. Every child — every person — deserves to know that we are all wonderfully made. That you come from love. And that your story matters.