Is Sunshine Guilt Giving You FOMO?
Feeling guilty for staying indoors on a sunny day? Same
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Reviewed by Daniel B. Block, MDReviewed by Daniel B. Block, MD
The sun is shining, the streets are buzzing, and you're stuck inside. Whether you're indoors because of work, illness, family, or some other reason, spending a beautiful sunny day inside can leave you feeling frustrated—and sometimes even a little bit guilty.
This feeling is known as 'sunshine guilt,' aka the pangs of guilt and regret you might feel when missing out on a beautiful day. Consider it a type of FOMO or the "fear of missing out." While everyone else seems to be outdoors making the most of the good weather, you're stuck indoors, preoccupied with other tasks and feeling down for missing out on the sunny skies.
It can be guilt-inducing, but there are things that you can do to cope. Keep reading to learn more about what causes sunshine guilt, how it might make you feel, and how to manage it.
Understanding Sunshine Guilt
A recent uptick in social media conversations and posts related to the experience of sunshine guilt suggests this is a common feeling for many people.
One TikTok user, Renee Reina, summarized what it feels like to experience sunshine guilt: "It is an abnormally beautiful day outside, but I'm tired. So now I feel this pressure to go outside and go for a walk and enjoy the weather while it lasts. I can't enjoy myself indoors now, because the whole time I'm thinking that I should be outside."
So why is it that a lovely, sunny day leaves so many people struggling with feelings of guilt or remorse? The answer is a bit complicated.
"People experience 'sunshine guilt' due to a combination of societal expectations and personal beliefs about productivity and leisure," says Dr. Caroline Fenkel, DSW, LCSW, the chief clinical officer and adolescent mental health expert at Charlie Health. "In many cultures, there is an underlying belief that we should maximize our time outdoors when the weather is nice, as if we owe it to ourselves to make the most of good weather. This can create a sense of obligation that, if unmet, leads to guilt."
At its core, sunshine guilt stems from FOMO, or the fear of missing out on something others enjoy.
Social Comparison and Sunshine Guilt
We all have a natural tendency to compare ourselves to other people but it's amplified even more when we see our friends and family posting their lives on social media. When a friend posts a photo of themselves enjoying an outdoor activity, you might feel even more pressured and miserable about not being able to have the same experiences.
"Seeing others enjoy a sunny day, often through social media, is likely to heighten feelings of guilt and a yearning to experience the joy they are witnessing others put out," Rachel Goldberg, MS, LMFT, founder of Rachel Goldberg Therapy. "This fear of missing out, driven by social comparison, can result in someone feeling disconnected or settling into a 'woe is me' mentality."
Because you can't get outside and make the most of the day, you might feel like you're missing out on a unique opportunity that doesn't happen every day. This is especially true if you've experienced a period of less-than-ideal weather (re: doom and gloomy skies) and this is the first time the sun has made an appearance.
Fear of Missing the Mental Health Benefits of Being Outdoors
Some of these feelings may stem from our knowledge about the benefits of spending time outdoors. In general, we know that spending time outside is good for our mental health. Lack of sunlight is associated with seasonal affective disorder (SAD), and many of us are familiar with feeling our mood drop during the dark, cold days of winter.
Takeaway
Research also tends to support this idea. One study found that there was a positive association between exposure to sunlight and mental health.
Weather can certainly have an impact on mood. Research has found that people generally tend to experience better moods in response to warmer temperatures and other research has found that poor weather may contribute to greater depressive symptoms.
Scarcity Mindset Can Lead to Sunshine Guilt
One of the reasons why you may be experiencing sunshine guilt is because of a scarcity mindset. Because the weather has been bad in the past (and might be bad again in the future), there's this idea that there are only a limited number of nice days you'll be able to enjoy. That can leave you with the sense that if you "waste" this one by staying indoors, then you are losing out on the limited nice days that are available.
Effects of Sunshine Guilt
Sunshine guilt might seem like another thing to criticize yourself about, but it’s important not to dismiss these feelings. They can be signs that you need to give yourself more opportunities to take breaks or spend a little more leisure time in the great outdoors.
Sunshine guilt may trigger a range of emotional and mental effects, including:
Feeling guilty about staying inside
A sense of regret that you’ve missed out on an opportunity
Pressure to finish up indoor tasks so you can spend time outside
Trouble focusing on tasks
Decreased satisfaction
Feeling of anxiety or sadness
Sunshine guilt can even take a toll on your productivity and self-esteem. That lingering sense that you’re "wasting" your day can make it harder to focus on the work you are trying to accomplish, which can kill your motivation and hurt your ability to get work done efficiently.
Takeaway
In other words, feeling bad about staying inside to work might make it harder to finish tasks, which can prolong the need to stay indoors.
This cycle can leave you feeling unproductive, unaccomplished, and longing for a break. Research has shown that the fear of not living up to expectations, both your own and those of other people, can have a detrimental impact on how you feel about yourself.
Coping Strategies for Sunshine Guilt
When the sun is shining and you start to feel those twinges of guilt and regret, try the following strategies to help make your day easier and less guilt-inducing.
Bring the Sunshine Indoors
One way to manage feelings of sunshine guilt is to let some of that light and warmth into your space. This can help you feel more connected with the outdoors, even if you spend most of your time inside the house.
Open the curtains and windows: Rather than drawing the blinds and trying to block out reminders of the beautiful day, invite that sunshine indoors. Leave the curtains open and even crack the windows if you can.
Add indoor plants: You may also find it helpful to add indoor plants and greenery to your living or office space. Research has shown that interaction with indoor plants is associated with decreased physiological and psychological stress.
Use bright-colored decor: Sunshine guilt might feel more pronounced when your indoor space is dreary or gloomy. Incorporating bright colors into your decor may help lift your mood and mimic the feeling of a sunny day.
Related: Here's How to Optimize Your Space For Better Mental Health
Give Yourself Outdoor Breaks
Remind yourself that it isn’t an all-or-nothing conflict. Even if you can’t spend all day basking in the outdoors, try to pop outside for a short respite when you can. This might involve just spending a few moments outside while you chat on the phone, taking a short walk around the block during your lunch break, or enjoying your lunch outside.
Adrian Guffogg, a therapist and psychosocial practitioner at Acquiesce, suggests grabbing opportunities for sunshine and time outdoors whenever you can. "If there are opportunities to walk between buildings at work, then seek them out or take a stroll during a break rather than sitting indoors," he suggests. "Plan ahead and look for new places to visit for walks or picnics, to eat outside rather than sticking to a usual routine of eating inside at home."
Takeaway
No matter how you manage it, squeezing in a few minutes to enjoy the nice weather can help lift your mood and give you a break from the feeling that you are missing out.
Show Yourself Some Compassion
Don’t beat yourself up for feeling disappointed or upset about not being able to spend the day outside. Allow yourself to feel sad or disappointed. The key is to acknowledge that feeling but not try to shame or guilt yourself for feeling it. Remind yourself that while it's disappointing, this isn't the only chance you'll have.
These feelings are temporary; there will be other nice days to enjoy, and there are things you can do to cope with what you're experiencing. "The feeling of missing out is temporary, and other opportunities to enjoy good weather will arise," Goldberg says.
Overcoming Sunshine Guilt
Sunshine guilt doesn’t have to get you down if you can find a way to shift your mindset.
Reframe Your Thoughts
Changing how you think about spending the day indoors can help eliminate feelings of guilt and regret. Instead of focusing on what you think you're missing by not being outside, shift your thinking to focus on the benefits of being indoors.
"To reduce feelings of sunshine guilt, it's helpful to reframe the situation by focusing on what is most beneficial and meaningful for you at the moment," says Dr. Fenkel. "Recognize that self-care and productivity come in many forms, and sometimes, staying indoors is exactly what you need for your well-being."
For example, you might remind yourself that you are being productive now so you can have more leisure time later on. Or, maybe you just enjoy the peace and comfort of relaxing at home.
"Remind yourself that it's okay to prioritize different aspects of your life, whether it be work, rest, or indoor activities that bring you joy. Consider the bigger picture of your overall mental and physical health rather than feeling pressured by the temporary state of the weather."
Dr. Caroline Fenkel, DSW, LCSW
Remind Yourself That It’s Important to Rest
Even if you aren't busy with work or other obligations, it's perfectly fine to stay inside and rest. There's nothing wrong with enjoying a peaceful day indoors, even when the weather is beautiful.
Sometimes, you just might not have the energy or be in the right mood seize the day. Having a lie in, enjoying your indoor hobbies, or even just lounging around the house aren't wasteful activities if that's what you need in the moment.
Takeaway
It’s also important to remember that the intense pressure that many of us feel to be productive at every moment is a byproduct of “hustle culture,” a philosophy that prioritizes productivity, achievement, and success over happiness and well-being.
It’s a toxic mindset that can contribute to overwork and burnout. Tell yourself that it’s good to be productive, but it’s also important to find a balance that allows you to rest and relax free of guilt and shame.
Related: The Growing Burden of "Reply ASAP" Culture
Use Relaxation Techniques
Relaxation practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and journaling can help you better appreciate the present moment and stave off feelings of guilt. For example, writing in a gratitude journal allows you to better appreciate the positive parts of your day, even if you are spending it indoors.
"Take a moment to list three things you are grateful for while staying indoors," Goldberg recommends. "Perhaps you aren’t risking sunburn or enjoying the quiet in the house."
Schedule Time Outdoors
Goldberg also suggests planning future activities as a way to help manage feelings of sunshine guilt. Spending more time outdoors when you can is a great way to avoid feeling guilty about being inside on a nice day.
Takeaway
Try spending more time outside before and after work while the sun is shining. Weekend outdoor activities can also help compensate for the time you spend indoors during the work week.
"Schedule outdoor activities for your next available day off or weekend," he says. "Having something to look forward to will help to reduce current feelings of guilt and even allow you to enjoy the moments in the sun more when not taking them for granted."
Seeking Support for Sunshine Guilt
Most importantly, don’t beat yourself up if you are feeling a little bit of sunshine guilt. Remember, this is a common experience for many people. You might even find it helpful to talk about it with friends, family, and co-workers can help.
You might even be surprised to find that a lot of people are feeling the same way as you. While it might not completely eliminate your feelings of guilt, knowing that others are having the same struggles can help you to feel less alone.
Takeaway
Joining groups based on outdoor interests can also help you combat feelings of sunshine guilt and give you something to look forward to the next time you are able to spend some time outdoors.
For example, consider joining a gardening club or hiking group in your area where you can schedule meetups with other people who share your appreciation for outdoor activities. Spending a little more time outside when you can around supportive people might help stave off nagging feelings of FOMO the next time you are inside on a nice day.
Takeaways
If you find yourself glancing wistfully out the window when you are at home or work, remember that you’re not alone. Sunshine guilt is a common feeling for many of us, and it can be especially strong during those early spring or late autumn days when warm, sunny days tend to be few and far between.
"Strive for balance and be flexible with your time," says Fenkel. "Understand that there will be other sunny days, and it's okay to miss out on one."
So, if you’re afraid you’re wasting the day and feeling guilty about it, remind yourself that there will be more to come. Shifting your mindset, enjoying the nice weather in ways that you can, and giving yourself something to look forward to can combat those lingering pangs of sunshine guilt.
Related: Why Yard Work Is Good for Your Mental Health
Read the original article on Verywell Mind.
