When Johnny Carson Ruled the Oscars: What Jimmy Kimmel Could Learn From the ‘Tonight Show’ Host
Back when there was only one undisputed King of Late Night, Johnny Carson owned the Oscars. From 1979 to 1982, and again in 1984, the Tonight Show host was the bridge to a new era for the telecast, taking over from Bob Hope (who hosted 19 times between 1940 and 1978) and paving the way for Billy Crystal, who made the gig his own in a four-year run from 1990 to 1993 (he would host five more times after that, most recently in 2012.)
This year’s host, Jimmy Kimmel, is the first broadcast network late-night host to emcee since David Letterman gave it a shot in 1995. (Jon Stewart of Comedy Central’s Daily Show also hosted twice, in 2006 and 2008.) Could Jimmy take a cue from Johnny? Even though Carson’s Oscars debut was almost 40 years ago, a look back at some of his opening monologues includes jokes Kimmel might tell today with little variation, as well as some punch lines that will seem remarkably dated to modern ears.
(Note: The official Oscars clips below contain the entire opening of the broadcast with voice-overs, including lines such as “Cesar Romero, one of the city’s most popular escorts” in 1980 and “first-time nominee Meryl Streep” in 1979. Carson would not hit the stage until about 10 minutes into the telecast.)
Related: How to Watch the 2017 Oscars
1979 (Carson monologue begins at 9:10)
Jokes Kimmel could adapt today: Looking out at the assembled “glorious throng of beautiful people,” Carson notes, “I see a lot of new faces — especially on the old faces.” Plastic surgery jokes never go out of style.
Dig Kimmel could adapt today: Neither do jokes at the telecast’s expense: Carson welcomes us to “Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.”
Joke Kimmel would never tell today: At the start of his monologue, Carson tweaks Hollywood politics, announcing in mock seriousness: “Before we begin tonight, ladies and gentlemen, I would like to say for the record that I am in favor of using more American Indians and other minorities in motion pictures. [Audience laughs at this]. I am against polluting the oceans of the world. I am for every nationality having its own homeland. I am against whacking baby seals on the head. And I am for saving the whales. And now… [laughter and applause]. Thank you, I’ve never received a squatting ovation before.”
1980 (Carson monologue begins at 9:20)
Joke Kimmel could adapt today: Perhaps a precursor to 2014 host Ellen DeGeneres’s pizza run: Carson pauses in the middle of the monologue to ask for the audience’s help. “Since I have you all here, my wife, Joanna, is decorating our bedroom, and she won’t make up her mind on the wallpaper,” he says, as he holds up two options and asks the audience to choose by applause (damask pattern beats stripes). “I know you think it’s silly to interrupt a big show like this, but a marriage is worth saving in this town.”
Joke Kimmel would never tell today: Referring to the number of 1979 films about divorce, Carson notes, “It says something about our times when the only lasting relationship was the one in La Cage aux Folles.” [Audience laughs]
1982 (Carson monologue begins at 12:59)
Jokes Kimmel could adapt today: “This is the 54th year of this awards show, and coincidentally, this is the 54th awards show of this year.”
“You will see three hours of comedy, music, and drama. Of course, we will have to interrupt the commercials once in a while to give out some awards.”
Dig Kimmel could adapt today: “Welcome to Long Day’s Journey Into Night”
Joke Kimmel would never tell today: “Critics say they’re not hiring minorities in films — not true. Any actor in this town that’s working is in a minority.” [Laughter and applause]
Quick Carson reaction: “Wasn’t it great that James Cagney and Fred Astaire returned to the screen to entertain us through another depression? [Long applause; Carson seems bemused] You’re applauding for the depression?”
1984 (Carson monologue begins at approximately 10:05)
Jokes Kimmel could adapt today: “Results of the balloting are known only to Price, and Waterhouse, and a 13-year-old whiz kid in Omaha who patched into their computer last Thursday.”
“Not one of the nominated films had a character that can be sold as a doll.” [No laughs]
“This is Oscars night: Take the excitement of the Grammys, the wit and sophistication of the Tonys, put them all together and what have you got? I haven’t the slightest idea, but it’s just an interesting question.”
“There will be winners and losers, but I would like to say there’s no award for acting surprised. [Little response] That joke will be very big in Tunisia.”
Dig Kimmel could adapt today: “Welcome to the Night of Living Dangerously”
Carson gets personal: “My personal life has been exactly like this year’s Academy Awards: It started off with Terms of Endearment, I thought I had The Right Stuff, it cost a lot to Dresser; then came The Big Chill, and the past month I’ve been begging for Tender Mercies.”
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